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MINM: Alice In Wonderland 3D

Sadly, I do not think Disney and Tim Burton are two entertainment institutions meant to coexist. I didn’t actually realise that this new venture of Burton’s was a Disney flick.

As an Alice lover, the film disappointed on a few fronts. Yes, it was utterly gorgeous, surreal and visually sumptuous, but I went in thinking it would be a fairly straight-but-awesome adaptation of Carroll’s book Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. Not so. The ideas are, however, unmistakably original – a girl named Alice Kingsley is plunged back into a world that she thinks is part of her dreams after trying to escape societal pressures placed upon her.

When she falls down the rabbit-hole, she seems to spend a lot of her time proving that she is indeed an Alice, not necessarily the Alice, in a very confused mish-mash of Carroll’s oeuvre – both the Alice books, and the delicious poem ‘Jabberwocky’. I’m trying to determine whether or not Burton has any references to ‘The Hunting of the Snark’ but I think I’d need to rewatch the film.

It’s definitely worth a watch if you enjoy the Alice mythos as of course there are some brilliant bits. Johnny Depp as the Mad Hatter is spot-on, though I really adored Alice. Helena Bonham-Carter’s Red Queen seems to have shades of Miranda Richardson’s Queenie (from Blackadder II).

I like that it raises a few interesting issues or concepts for consideration, though perhaps to a very specific (read: wanky) audience. For instance, what is in a name? By extension, what is in the name of an author? Alice constantly has to prove herself, and acknowledges that she is not the Alice this Wonderland wants, or needs. A scroll telling of the ‘Frabjous Day’ has already ‘written’ Wonderland’s history and fate. As a former lit student, I was naturally reminded of Roland Barthes’ ‘Death of the Author’ and Michel Foucault’s ‘What is an author’ essays – both of which are shoved down every first-year lit student’s throat.

We also get a dose of watered-down Freudian psychoanalysis with the Red Queen’s obsession with decapitation (which one supposes translates to Freudian castration). Yawn, yes, I know, this has been pointed out ad nauseum in relation to Carroll’s text. It is extended to include the rather surreal and grotesque practice of pricking in this particular film, and the taking out of various characters’ eyes – this to me reeks of Burton proper, none of this candy Disney stuff. Poking out eyes is disturbing, and its use in the film is deliberate.

The Red Queen makes an interesting point to her knave (who accuses the object of his desire, ‘Um’ of making an unwanted sexual advance towards him), about how one must decapitate or kill those whom she fears, so that she cannot be let down by them. Both of these characters have very unusual and unconventional modes of acknowledging their sexualities. A straight Freudian reading would intimate that they fetishise, and therefore are deviant in their sexuality.

A very sad way to live one’s life, killing those we fear, but not dissimilar to America’s modus operandi in regards to world politics. Yes, yes, us arts grads are an annoying lot when it comes to reading metaphor in any text.

Edit: @coliwilso has kindly pointed out to me that the poem ‘Jabberwocky’ is in fact in Through the Looking Glass, or, What Alice Found There. Cheers, old man!

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local lit mags

Last year, I bought a joint subscription to the Adelaide-based Wet Ink and Melbourne-based Overland journals.

I’ve received all four issues of Wet Ink and must say the first issue was appalling. I didn’t find any of the contributions engaging, professional or enjoyable. The second issue is much better but there are still several pieces which have that not quite professional feel about them.

Overland, however, is a completely different case. All the pieces in the first issue received – fiction, articles, poetry, reviews – are of an extremely high standard and very thought-provoking. The piece I liked the least was one about blogging. The writer took a tone that I felt a little inappropriate – he was some sort of self-proclaimed expert on blogging and tried to explain the merits of blogging to a wider audience, but in so doing, came off as patronising. Especially when it can be assumed that Overland’s readership would be pretty intelligent and tech-savvy (for instance, the writer attempts to explain ‘trackbacks’ but not once does he actually identify them as such. Even the most basic of bloggers would be familiar with this term, surely?).

Am hoping to do another post on other Australian literary journals I’ve had the pleasure of reading a bit later. There are quite a few excellent ones about.

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Melbourne Writers’ Festival 2009

I was lucky enough las year to go to some Melbourne Writers’ Festival events. Apparently Melbourne is a designated City of Literature by UNESCO. I understand one has to bid and pay an exorbitant amount for this privilege.

The first event I went to with Ryan & T was a special screening of The Leopard at ACMI, directed by Visconti, and based on the novel by Lampedusa. Italian neo-realist cinema is quite a treat and I’d been wanting to see this film for ages but it rarely shows (and you can tell by the print, it’s not in fab condition). The Leopard is about a time in Italy when the aristocracy no longer enjoys the prestige it once used to – the working classes are tired of all the corruption and privileges afforded to this social class when in effect, they do so little for it and are lucky merely to be born in the right circumstances. The main character, played by an exceedingly debonair Burt Lancaster, is in an odd position in that he realises his nobility is on the way out.

I was hoping to read the novel before I saw the film, but time did not afford me that pleasure. Nevertheless, the film is an excellent piece on social history. A few of the ball scenes were a little long, but to be honest it’s hard to fault Visconti.

The second event was an all-day workshop with the American poet Emily Ballou, who has written a verse novel about Darwin. The workshop was held at RMIT City campus, which is pretty easy to get to via public transport.

This is probably one of the best workshops I’ve been to – she introduced me to so many exercises and prompts which is perfect for people who go through terrible bouts of writers’ block. We wrote poems based on…

- words plucked out of the dictionary at random
- picture prompts – a magazine page from National Geographic as inspiration
- taking an existing piece of literature and creating a ‘found’ text by striking out words from the given passage
- writing a stanza in addition to one written by the participant next to us

I have at least three poems from this workshop that I can work on, so I was pretty chuffed.

Last event, which I had so much fun at was the official launch of McSweeney’s 32, at The Toff In Town, in the city. All eventgoers got a copy of the beautiful quarterly – and they’ve never, ever launched outside of the States! Everyone seemed pretty excited.

The editor, Eli Horowitz was in attendance to talk to us, as were two of the contributors to read passages from their stories. Then there were a few acts – Suitcase Royale (surreal comedy act), The Bent Leather Band (instruments of electronic and leather-bound manipulation), and a fellow who read a cyberpunk manifesto (even though I swear one already exists, by Donna Haraway). There were some really cool steampunk furnishings on stage, too.

I didn’t get to go to as many events as I wanted, but the MWF was ridiculous fun. Bonus for being able to give Emily Ballou a lift to another MWF event, and she was adorably clad in Emily Dickinson-inspired attire (I believe she was reading her work). I really need to track down a copy of her verse novel on Darwin and recommend other poetry-inspired folk do so too.

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MIFF 2009

Just some thoughts on the films I’ve caught for the Melbourne International Film Festival 2009. I know it’s long after the fact but I’ve never been good at churning out things!
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boombox!

I found out about this on a music community on LJ of all places, yeah okay, admittedly they’re pretty hip…

So this dude decides to dance to 100 songs, in 100 different places, in 100 days. His moves are awe-inspiring. I feel happy just watching him strut his stuff, seriously. Some people just make life look so…fun. Ely Kim, said dancer, is one such person.

BOOMBOX from Ely Kim on Vimeo.

Tracklist is as follows (if you’re not interested, skip):

001. Heart of Glass / Blondie
002. Jimmy / M.I.A.
003. Deceptacon / Le Tigre
004. Im on Fire / 5000 Volts
005. Je Veux Te Voir / YELLE
006. The Way I Are / Timbaland
007. Too Young / Phoenix
008. Over And Over / Hot Chip
009. Stick It To The Pimp / Peaches
010. Say My Name / Destiny’s Child
011. Pin / Yeah Yeah Yeahs
012. Geremia / Bonde Do Role
013. Let Me Clear My Throat / DJ Kool
014. Point Of No Return / Expose
015. Bubble Sex / The Seebach Band
016. Pump Up the Jam / Technotronic
017. Let’s Make Love And Listen To Death From Above / CSS
018. Hella Nervous / Gravy Train
019. Me Plus One / Annie
020. Don’t Go / Yaz
021. Bootylicious / Destiny’s Child
022. Electric Feel / MGMT
023. Boys Don’t Cry / The Cure
024. Lose Control / Missy Elliott
025. Ride The Lightning / Evans And Eagles
026. Don’t Stop ‘Til You Get Enough / Michael Jackson
027. Hearts On Fire / Cut Copy
028. Tainted Love / Soft Cell
029. Between Us & Them / Moving Units
030. It Feels Good / Tony Toni Tone
031. Polaris (Club Mix) / Cyber People
032. You Never Can Tell / Chuck Berry
033. Huddle Formation / The Go! Team
034. Pump That / FannyPack
035. My Love / Justin Timberlake
036. Hung Up / Madonna
037. Justice – D.A.N.C.E (MSTRKRFT Remix) / Justice
038. Cybernetic Love / Casco
039. Creep / TLC
040. When I Hear Music / Debbie Deb
041. B.O.B. / Outkast
042. Bubble Pop Electric / Gwen Stefani
043. Miss You Much / Janet Jackson
044. You Spin Me Round / Dead Or Alive
045. Slide In / Goldfrapp
046. Kelly / Van She
047. Mine Fore Life / The Sounds
048. Disco Heat / Calvin Harris
049. Nighttiming / Coconut Records
050. Club Action / Yo Majesty
051. Pogo / Digitalism
052. Lip Gloss / Lil Mama
053. Heartbeats / The Knife
054. Enola Gay / OMD
055. Goodbye Girls / Broadcast
056. Kids In America / Kim Wilde
057. Kiss / Prince
058. Tenderness / General Public
059. Push It / Salt N Pepa
060. Circle, Square, Triangle / Test Icicles
061. Day ‘N’ Nite (Crookers Remix) / Kid Cudi
062. Shadows / Midnight Juggernauts
063. Paris (Aeroplane Remix) / Friendly Fires
064. Out At The Pictures / Hot Chip
065. Me Myself and I / De La Soul
066. AudioTrack 10 / Diplo
067. Girls & Boys / Blur
068. Heater / Samim
069. I Wanna Dance With Somebody / Whitney Houston
070. Hands In The Air / Girl Talk
071. Limited Edition OJ Slammer / Cadence Weapon
072. Meeting In The Ladys Room / Mary Jane Girls
073. NY Lipps / Soulwax
074. Lex / Ratatat
075. Gravity’s Rainbow (Soulwax Remix) / Steve Aoki
076. Once In A Lifetime / Talking Heads
077. Leave It Alone / Operator Please
078. Half Mast / Empire Of The Sun
079. Hardcore Girls / Count and Sinden feat. Rye Rye
080. Dance, Dance, Dance / Lykke Li
081. Never Gonna Get It / En Vogue
082. Blue Monday / New Order
083. Crazy In Love (Featuring Jay-Z) / Beyoncé
084. 10 Dollar / M.I.A.
085. Love To Love You Baby / Donna Summer
086. Steppin’ Out / Lo-Fi-Fnk
087. Karle Pyar Karle / Asha Bhosle
088. Love Will Tear Us Apart / Joy Division
089. Straight Up / Paula Abdul
090. My Drive Thru / Santogold, Casablancas, NERD
091. Like A Prayer / Madonna
092. Freedom 90 / George Michael
093. Black & Gold / Sam Sparro
094. B-O-O-T-A-Y / Spank Rock and Benny Blanco
095. Great Dj / The Ting Tings
096. In A Dream / Rockell
097. Don’t Stop the Music / Rihanna
098. Hong Kong Garden / Siouxsie & The Banshees
099. It’s Tricky / D.M.C.
100. Bizarre Love Triangle / New Order

Now, if you’ll excuse me, there’s a certain funky dancing friend of mine I want to grab and dance like a retard with.

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another meme

Filched from thehomicidehoe at LJ. I filled it in on Tuesday evening – this will make sense for some of the questions.

1. What time did you get up this morning?
Midday. Yes, not morning.

2. Diamonds or pearls?

I love pearls.

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema?

Samson and Delilah

4. What is your favourite TV show?
I don’t really have a favourite TV show, but I loved The X-Files when I did.

5. What do you usually have for breakfast?
Those manky liquid breakfast drinks, a cup of tea and my meds.

6. What is your middle name?
My mother’s first name. (A friend of mine tells me this is unfortunate)

7. What food do you dislike?
Boiled eggs, offal.

8. What is your favourite CD at the moment?
Erm, probably the Holy Fuck album.

9. What kind of car do you drive?
Mazda tiny whatsit. Hmm, I ought to find out the model eh?

10. Favourite sandwich?
Cheese, tomato and ham.

11. What characteristic do you despise?
Lying! Gah.

12. Favourite item of clothing?
Fake leather jacket.

13. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go?
Canada!

14. Favourite brand of clothing?
Don’t have one at the moment. If I could afford it, I’d buy Nicola Finetti though. Yum.

15. Where would you retire to?

Probably somewhere in Europe.

16. What was your most recent memorable birthday?
20th or 25th

17. Favourite sport to watch?
Football NOT handegg. (giggles for Luke)

18. When is your birthday?
March 18th

19. Are you a morning person or a night person?
NIGHT

20. What is your shoe size?
6 aus / 4 uk

21. Pets?
A tabby cat.

22. Any new and exciting news you’d like to share with us?
My mentor is coming to visit me next week!

23. How are you feeling today?
Earlier, nauseous. Now – excited and nervous

24. What are your favourite sweets?

I like so many – too difficult a question.

25. What is your favourite flower?
Orchids, christmas lilies.

26. What is a day on the calendar you are looking forward to?
I’ve nothing specific to look forward to at present, but nothing to dread either.

27. What is your full name?
Ask me in person.

28. What are you listening to right now?
Coil’s ‘Love’s Secret Domain’ album

29. What was the last thing you ate?

chickpeas

30. Do you wish on stars?
no

31. If you were a crayon, what color would you be?
Lemon yellow

32. How is the weather right now?
Cold but crisp

33. The last person you spoke to on the phone yesterday?

@tristankenney whereas today my doctor’s secretary.

34. Favourite soft drink?

Creamy soda.

35. Favourite restaurant?
Momotaro Rahmen, Richmond (in Melbourne, Australia).

36. Hair Colour?

Natural very dark brown.

37. What was your favourite toy as a child?
Mooy. I don’t want to talk about it. Too painful.

38. Summer or winter?
Winter, undoubtedly.

39. Hugs or kisses?
Well, I only like either from people I’m really close to.

40. Chocolate or Vanilla?
chocolate

41. Coffee or tea?
tea

42. When was the last time you cried?
Well, my eyes watered when I threw up this morning. But I can’t really remember the last time I cried. I suspect it would have been about my ex though.

43. What is under your bed?
Nothing – nothing fits under it

44. What did you do last night?
Chatted online to a friend.

45. What are you afraid of?
Oh god so much.

46. Salty or sweet?
I can’t choose.

47. How many keys on your key ring?
7 or so?

48. How many years at your current job?

Almost 2 years

49. Favourite day of the week?
Wednesdays, Fridays, Saturdays

50. How many towns have you lived in?
UK: Balham, Abbeywood, Croydon.
Philippines: Cardona.
Australia: Mill Park, Brunswick West, North Melbourne

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meme time

Pinched from Dee – been a while since I did one of these. I’m too lazy to correct the American spelling, sorry.

50 Random Questions

1. What color is your toothbrush?
Purple, my favourite colour
2. Name one person who made you smile today
The lollipop man on Miller St, Nth Fitzroy!.
3. What were you doing at 8am this morning?
Irritating my workmate.
4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago?
Driving.
5. What is your favorite candy bar?
Ooh toss-up between Bounty and Twix.
6. Have you ever been to a strip club?
No, but I have seen two strippers perform.
7. What is the last thing you said aloud?
Thanks.
8. What is your favorite ice cream?
A good rich chocolate.
9. What was the last thing you had to drink?
Peppermint tea.
10. Do you like your wallet?
I love it – it has a pullable cat tail on it!
11. What was the last thing you ate?
Gnocchi quatro formaggi!
12. Have you bought any new clothing items this week?
No.
13. The last sporting event you watched?
Probably a UEFA cup game on TV.
14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?
Buttered.
15. Who is the last person you sent a text message to?
My workmate Stu.
16. Ever go camping?
Yes, but it’s been a really long time..
17. Do you take vitamins daily?
No.
18. Do you go to church every Sunday?
No, thank god.
19. Do you have a tan?
Well, I’m naturally brown. I don’t mind occasional sun but I actually burn in the sun so I’ve got to be careful.
20. Do you prefer Chinese food over pizza?
Ooh, depends on how good or bad they are.
21. Do you drink your soda with a straw?
Not really. Sometimes out of a glass but rarely.
22. What did your last text message say?
I’ll be there in 20 :)
23. What are you doing tomorrow?
Working and probably destroying my liver.
25. Look to your left, what do you see?
Ironing board.
26. What color is your watch?
I don’t wear one as they make me anxious.
27. What do you think of when you hear Australia?
Far.
29. Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru?

Drive-through, unless I’m drunk and have to sit there to eat. No, I didn’t drive there drunk.
30. What is your favorite number?
I don’t really have one.
31. Who’s the last person you talked to on the phone?
Stu.
33. How many states have you lived in?
One in Australia.
34. Biggest annoyance right now?
Painful stomach and can’t figure out why.
35. Last song listened to?
One of the tracks off the Holy Fuck album
36.Can you say the alphabet backwards?
Not without intense concentration, I’d wager.
37. Do you have a maid service clean your house?
No, but am thinking of paying for one for a week for my mother for her birthday.
38. Favorite pair of shoes you wear all the time?
My favourite shoes are not ones I wear all the time. Ones I wear all the time are my slip-on faux sneakers. Fave ones are my bright red high-top ones.
39. Are you jealous of anyone?
I get pangs of it, but I find it really hard to sustain being jealous.
40. Is anyone jealous of you?
I highly doubt it.
41. Do you love anyone?
Romantically? Possibly still my ex. In a filial manner, many people.
42. Do any of your friends have children?
A few.
43. What do you usually do during the day?
When at work, answer calls. When not, I read and spend a lot of time listening to music or on the internet.
44. Do you hate anyone that you know right now?
No. I’m scared of some people, but I don’t hate anyone.
45. Do you use the word ‘hello’ daily?
Not really. Probably ‘hi’ or ‘hullo’.
46. What color is your car?
Silver
47. Do you like cats?
No, I LOVE them!
48. Are you thinking about someone right now?
Yes, my father – wondering if he’s feeling better from his bronchitis.
49. Have you ever been to Six Flags?
Um, dunno what that is.
50. How did you get your worst scar?
My awesome Russia-shaped one from childhood on my left knee that has sadly faded – from falling out of a guava tree in the Philippines. My current worst ‘zipper’ – from a craft knife.

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write about stuff

I was talking to a friend’s boyfriend the other day who did once write poetry and he asked me “What do you write about?”.

I always find this really difficult to answer. Yea eloquence fail.

So…I thought I’d do a summary of what I’ve written so far this year:

- just this morning, I wrote a poem about plums. Largely inspired by slivovitz and this William Carlos Williams poem
- a poem about a dead moth, this one in particular
- a poem inspired by the sociological theory called Dunbar’s number
- a Richard Brautigan three-liner about cafe lattes
- a verse novel one about another drunk night at a tavern

Non-poetry-wise, blogging, semi-reviewing and fervently recording my dreams. People with problems have weird dreams. At the moment I seem to be hellbent on reviewing just about everything. This is a little silly.

As stupid as it sounds, I do often put a bit of effort into my tweets. Yes, I realise this is inanity at its best. However, it’s a challenge – some people have a skill for making the inane sound really, really interesting (a constant work in progress on my part).

Compare “waiting to have a haircut” to “waiting at the doctor’s and the magazines tell me Hillary Clinton is our only hope”. The latter tweet was from Neil Gaiman, and made well after Obama was inaugurated. Guess if you can write, even your microblogging seems awesome.

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tech geek excitation

By no stretch of the imagination am I a tech geek. Nu-uh. I think as far as arts geeks go, I tend to like getting my feet wet in some geekery, but not much.

A few weeks ago, I got a Nokia N95 and didn’t really think much of it at the time. I mean, it phones people, it saves numbers, woo-hoo.

Then, one evening I sat down with it and started to look into what it was this thing could really do. Hm. Mobile versions of websites, applications. Wot wot? I thought that stuff was only good for iPhones (which are the devil but I secretly lust after it. Are you happy, Amy?).

Some of you may know about my love for music. Fewer of you know of my love for scrobbling and last.fm. Imagine the figurative jizz in my pants when I discovered an application, specifically for the N95 that allows whatever I listen to on said N95 to scrobble.

The application is called Mobbler. I’ve installed it on my N95 and it indeed does work. I haven’t tested it with listening to actual last.fm radio stations (I don’t use that function much as streaming is slow and to be honest, I have shitloads of music to listen to as it is).

So yeah, now the music I listen to at work to combat Bad 10-Year Old Techno-Listening Guy will actually scrobble. Yeah, I know, easily amused. My life is crap, cut me some slack.

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phew!


Your result for The Would You Have Been a Nazi Test…

The Expatriate

Achtung! You are 8% brainwashworthy, 27% antitolerant, and 24% blindly patriotic

Congratulations! You are not susceptible to brainwashing, your values and cares extend beyond the borders of your own country, and your Blind Patriotism does not reach unhealthy levels. If you had been German in the 30s, you would’ve left the country.

One bad scenario — as I hypothetically project you back in time — is that you just wouldn’t have cared one way or the other about Nazism. Maybe politics don’t interest you enough. But the fact that you took this test means they probably do. I’m gonna give you the benefit of the doubt.

Did you know that many of the smartest Germans departed prior to the beginning of World War II, because they knew some evil shit was brewing? Brain Drain. Many of them were scientists. It is very possible you could have been one of them.

Conclusion: born and raised in Germany in the early 1930’s, you would not have been a Nazi.

1589906613262667319.jpeg

The Would You Have Been A Nazi? Test
- it rules –


Take The Would You Have Been a Nazi Test
at HelloQuizzy

Um, I can think of several reasons I wouldn’t have been a Nazi, but it’s always good to take an internet quiz so you know it’s true… *rolls eyes*. Hell, the Nazis would have gassed my arse. Or experimented on me. Or do whatever it is they did with the “not-quite-right”.

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social networking

I was chatting with @lluke very early this morning and he told me that “blogging is so 2005″. I realise blogging isn’t en vogue these days, but I harbour a fondness for it. Perhaps because it allows me to crap on ad infinitum. I mainly do it as a record I can read back on for when I go all Mrs Dalloway Septimus, which isn’t really any fun.

I’m only listing the ones I use or have a signed account with.

So, you want to know what I’m doing now? Well, you can check my Facebook status, or check my Twitter updates. Want to see me on video or see things I’ve filmed? Well, there’s YouTube or if you really have a short attention span, see my 12seconds account.

Want to see what I’m reading, or what books are in my collection? Check out my aNobii profile, or LibraryThing. How about the music I listen to? Why here you go! Oh, and (some of) my music collection on CD is here too.

Have a really short attention span? Then check out Tumblr which is somewhere between blogging and microblogging. Bonus points to anyone who can tell me how Posterous is different to Tumblr.

Then integrate all your feeds into one using FriendFeed.

There are a bunch of others I have accounts with that I just haven’t bothered to mention. Also, if you haven’t done so, I do recommend reading Mrs Dalloway by Virginia Woolf. It’s actually really good.

My faves are Twitter, last.fm and Tumblr (I have two differently themed Tumblrlogs). I do use LiveJournal to subscribe to communities that post poems daily, and also to comment on friends’ LJs.

Twitter I use to communicate with others. last.fm I use to discover new musical artists. Tumblr – one is for posting poems I really like or really hate, the other is for posting images I like. I was pretty obsessive about aNobii a while back but I haven’t been reading as much as I used (gee, I wonder why).

I’d tell you what I’m going to do now, but you’ll probably find out – regardless of your interest – on several feeds in a bit. kthxbai.

(edit: christ, I didn’t even mention BrightKite or TwitPic, both of which I use! Head…going…to…explode…)
(edit #2: forgot blip.fm. Am worst blogger EVAR)

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the stability stuff’s all wrong…

Advanced Global Personality Test Results

Extraversion |||||||||| 38%
Stability |||||||||||| 50%
Orderliness |||||||||| 34%
Accommodation |||||||||||||| 58%
Interdependence |||||| 30%
Intellectual |||||||||||||||||||| 82%
Mystical |||||||||||| 50%
Artistic |||||||||||||||||| 76%
Religious || 10%
Hedonism |||||||||| 36%
Materialism |||||||||||| 43%
Narcissism || 10%
Adventurousness |||||||||||||| 56%
Work ethic |||||||||||||||||| 76%
Humanitarian |||||||||||||| 56%
Conflict seeking |||||||||||| 43%
Need to dominate || 10%
Romantic |||||| 30%
Avoidant |||||||||||||||||||| 90%
Anti-authority |||||| 30%
Wealth |||||| 23%
Dependency |||||||||||| 50%
Change averse |||||||||||| 43%
Cautiousness |||||||||||||||||||| 83%
Individuality |||||||||||||||| 70%
Sexuality |||||||||||||||||| 76%
Peter pan complex |||||||||||| 43%
Family drive |||| 16%
Physical Fitness |||||||||||||||| %
Histrionic |||||||||| 36%
Paranoia |||||||||||||||||||| 83%
Vanity |||||| 23%
Honor |||||||||||||| 56%
Thriftiness |||||||||||||||| 70%

Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test
personality test by similarminds.com

Stability results were medium which suggests you are moderately relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic.

Orderliness results were moderately low which suggests you are, at times, overly flexible, improvised, and fun seeking at the expense of reliability, work ethic, and long term accomplishment.

Extraversion results were moderately low which suggests you are reclusive, quiet, unassertive, and secretive.

trait snapshot:
introverted, secretive, messy, depressed, does not like leadership, somewhat nihilistic, observer, does not make friends easily, unassertive, feels invisible, feels undesirable, hates large parties, does not like to stand out, leisurely, suspicious, submissive, abstract, unpredictable, intellectual, likes rain, likes the unknown, negative, weird, not a risk taker, unadventurous, avoidant, strange

(if the intertubes is telling me I’m strange and weird, it must be true! I tend to be so different when I’m well)

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25 things about me

Here are the rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 10 or more people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you.

1. Last night I drank 2/3rds of a bottle of red wine, about an inch or so of vodka, and about 3/5ths a bottle of Kahlua and am still hungover.
2. I hate the hot weather.
3. Despite being brown, I do still burn in the sun.
4. I once went out with a guy whose mother was born in the same hospital as me.
5. My PayPal account got hacked a few days ago.
6. I have been intimate with the former producer of Tortoise.
7. I have also been intimate with someone who claimed to be a member of Blonde Redhead before they got big.
8. I read Oliver Twist when I was five, when it was given to me as a gift.
9. Artificial intelligence developing human emotions makes me cry.
10. I’m not afraid to dine out by myself.
11. I’m afraid of the water, and don’t tend to enjoy beaches with waves.
12. I love thick cut day-old chips – cold.
13. I declare that I am too stupid for Linux.
14. I really like the Scottish accent.
15. It doesn’t happen often, but I feel ashamed whenever I get down about being single.
16. Having said that, I am perpetually lonely.
17. I love Japanese food, but hate Japanese curry.
18. My favourite Doctor Who is a tough one but it’d be a toss-up between Tom Baker and Sylvester McCoy.
19. I once won an award for being nice to my brother at primary school in England.
20. I’ve been taken to a witch doctor.
21. I used to really hate beer, till I moved into a house with a homebrewer.
22. I’ve never smoked a full cigarette.
23. Animal cruelty greatly upsets me.
24. I have an astigmatism in my left eye.
25. I love avocados, but it sets off my irritable bowel, so I can’t eat them anymore.

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tumble dry

Thanks Rob for updating my blog software. God knows I wouldn’t be able to do it. Yet…

I’d known about Tumblr for a while, but it was really @lluke that got me into it properly – I started using it to post the poems that I usually post here.

I’ve posted lots of poems on mine lately (see here if interested) and also recently subscribed to a few other Tumblrlogs that post some good content. Thought I might share the links.

mmryan posts varied content, but I’ve really been enjoying the poems posted. thatdreamofhorses posts images – I’ve been digging the works of Egon Schiele (German expressionist painter – modernism FTW!) but also some other cool stuff. My pal @lluke posts varied content, and apparently, according to how many posts I’ve marked as “liked” he’s my #1 Tumblr crush, haha. Link to his Tumblr is here. I’ve actually met him in person and he’s a pretty top bloke.

There’s an awful lot of crap on the intertubes, but golly, there’s some awesome stuff too. It’s so bleeding overwhelming sometimes.

Anyway, am going to use this day to catch up on my LJ poetry subscriptions. See if I can get the inbox down to less than 200 poems, eh?

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some awesome quiz thing

My Political Views
I am a left social libertarian
Left: 5.92, Libertarian: 5.05

Political Spectrum Quiz

My Foreign Policy Views
Score: -8.56

Political Spectrum Quiz

My Culture War Stance
Score: -8.27

Political Spectrum Quiz

It hasn’t changed since I last took the test, and I do believe it’s a little US-centric (you’ll see what I mean if you actually look at the questions). Wow, I’m old and am still a leftie. No wonder I’m not married, hehe. DH, if you read this, you’re not allowed to insult me. I plied your arse with lots of alcohol last time we went out, giggle.

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filched

…from big sis.

Name: Gem

Height: incarceration tells me 149cms!

Age: twenty-nine. Sigh

Tomboy or Girly Girl? Former.

Describe your beauty routine.
I use facial cleanser whenever I shower. That’s pretty much it.

Describe your hair
Brutally short and black-brown. It is actually brown but no one really believes me.

Describe your personal style

Comfort wins over looking good, much to the disappointment of my parents.

Do you…

Like metrosexual boys?
No largely straight girl likes boys that are prettier than her, but alas, ’tis life. I like them fine as long as their personalities are as lovely as their looks!

Like accessories?
I do but I often forget about them.

Like high heels?
NO NO NO.

Like matchy matchy, or mix and match?
Giggle, that sounds silly. Mix and match I guess?

Spend a lot of money on beauty products in general?
No, I spend too much on books!

Shop online for clothes?

Yep. threadless.com is full of major win. As is ModCloth.

Favourite…?

Article of clothing in your closet?
Jain (Melbourne designer) ‘Crustaceon (sic)’ dress that cost me a fortune.

Makeup line?
Um, Urban Decay, MAC & Shu Uemura. A holy trinity of sorts!

Skincare line?
Aesop. I nearly died when I saw they have a store on the corner of Victoria and Errol Streets (North Melb, about five minutes’ walk from me)

Perfume?
Fave in the world would be BPAL Bathsheba fragrance oil.

Colours to wear?
Black & red.

What is a trend you dislike the most?
Pretty much all of them.

What is your fashion philosophy?

Wear whatever you want? I constantly commit supposed fashion faux pas like wearing brown and black together. Meh. So what.

What kind of shoes do you like?
Ones that fit width-wise – very hard to find as I have narrow feet, but a bit big (length-wise) for my actual height.

What is your biggest fashion problem?

Finding the right-fitting bra. I’m small and big in odd spots.

What old trends do you think should come back?
Let’s all dress like we’re from the modernist era! Or like James Joyce (mismatched suits).

What one piece are you dying to add to your wardrobe?

The perfect pair of black jeans. Was gutted when I could no longer squeeze into my size 26 black Nudies (told you I was thin once!)

How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?

Physically, not long (thirty minutes). But mentally, takes at least an hour, or even two.

Would you ever go out in public without makeup?

Constantly do so.

If you had a fashion budget of 1 million dollars, where would you shop, and why?

Any high street in any town in London. Yes, I realise they use pounds there.

Is there anything you absolutely CAN’T wear?
Really pointy shoes look horrendous on me.

If you had to pick one designer to wear for the rest of your life, who would it be, and why?

If I could actually afford it? Marc Jacobs.

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some unusual quiz thing

This is going to show up in my Facebook feed eventually and I’ll tag people accordingly.

Post a comment (even people I didn’t tag) and I will do each of the following:

1. I’ll respond with something random about you.
2. I’ll tell you which song or movie reminds me of you.
3. I’ll pick a flavour of jelly to wrestle you in. (It was British anglicised…)
4. I’ll say something that only makes sense to you and me, if possible.
5. I’ll tell you my first memory of you.
6. I’ll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. I’ll ask you something I’ve always wondered about you.
8. I’ll tell you my favourite thing about you.
9. I’ll tell you my least favorite thing about you.

If you play, you MUST post this on yours.

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Protected: a Twitter poem

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lit stuff
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Australia meme

Oh lord, this is awful, but couldn’t resist. Filched from Pie.

AUSSIE MEME
Bold the ones you’ve done!

1. Heard a kookaburra in person
2. Slept under the stars

3. Seen a koala.
4. Visited Melbourne (me: well duh, I live here)
5. Watched a summer thunderstorm
6. Worn a pair of thongs
7. Been to Uluru (Ayer’s Rock).
8. Visited Cape York
9. Held a snake
10. Sang along with Khe San
11. Drank VB
12. Visited Sydney
13. Have seen a shark
14. Have used Aussie slang naturally in a conversation (me: I tried, and failed, apparently)
15. Had an actual conversation with an indigenous Australian (aboriginal).
16. Eaten hot chips from the bag at the beach
17. Walked/climbed over the Sydney Harbour Bridge.
18. Used an outside dunny, and checked under the seat before sitting down
19. Seen Chloe in Young & Jackson’s.
20. Slept on an overnight train or bus.
21. Been to Sydney’s Mardi Gras
22. Have gone bush-bashing
23. Taken a sickie
24. Been to see a game of Aussie Rules football
25. Have seen wild camels
26. Gone skinny dipping.
27. Had a Tim Tam Slam
28. Ridden in a tram in Melbourne
29. Been at an ANZAC day Dawn Service.
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Held a wombat
32. Been on a roadtrip of 800km or more
33. Seen the Great Australian Bight in person
34. Had a really bad sunburn (me: LAME. I’m brown already!)
35. Visited an aboriginal community
36. Seen a redback spider
37. Have watched Paul Hogan
38. Seen Blue Poles in person
39. Wandered barefoot in the bush/outback
40. Eaten Vegemite
41. Thrown a boomerang

42. Seen the Kimberleys
43. Given a hitch-hiker a lift
44. Been to Perth
45. Have tried Lemon, Lime and Bitters (me: that an Australian thing?)
46. Tried playing a didgeridoo
47. Seen dinosaur footprints (at the museum)
48. Eaten Tim Tams
49. Been to Darwin
50. Touched a kangaroo
51. Visted the Great Barrier Reef
52. Listened to Kevin Bloody Wilson
53. Killed a Cane Toad
54. Gone to a drive-in theatre
55. Have read and own books by Australian authors
56. Visited Adelaide
57. Know the story behind “Eternity”
58. Been camping
59. Visited Brisbane
60. Been in an outback pub
61. Know what the term “Waltzing Matilda” actually means
62. Gone whale watching.
63. Listened to Slim Dusty
64. Own five or more Australian movies or TV series
65. Sang along to Down Under
66. Have stopped specifically to look at an historic marker by the side of the road.
67. Eaten a 4′n’20 pie
68. Surfed at Bondi
69. Watched the cricket on Boxing Day (bah! Dad’s fault)
70. Visited Hobart
71. Eaten kangaroo
72. Seen a quokka
73. Visited Canberra
74. Visited rainforests
75. Used a Victa lawnmower
76. Travelled on a tram in Adelaide
78. Used a Hills hoist
79. Visited Kata Tjuta (the Olgas)
80. Used native Australian plants in cooking
81. Visited the snow
82. Chosen a side in Holden VS Ford
83. Visited the desert
84. Been water skiing
85. Read The Phantom
86. Visited Parliament House
87. Gone spotlighting or pig-shooting (me: WTF?)
88. Crossed the Nullarbor
89. Avoided swimming in areas because of crocodiles
90. Listened to AC/DC.
91. Called someone a dag

92. Voted in a Federal Election
93. Have been swimming and stayed between the flags
94. Had a possum in your roof
95. Visited the outback

96. Travelled over corrugated roads.
97. Hit a kangaroo while driving
98. Been well outside any mobile phone coverage
99. Seen an emu.
100. Have woken to the smell of bushfires
(me: does it count if they’re super far away and the smell’s drifted to your city because they were so bad?)

They gonna kick me out?

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I love you…

…but I want to fuck up your evil plan by posting the following:

His penis shattered my world.

Sorry Randall! (it’s better than vandalising a Wikipedia article)

No, I’ve no idea what the very last line of the post means and you’re only allowed to insult me about it if you’ve read either Ulysses or Finnegans Wake. That should keep the tech geeks quiet, one hopes.

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